Chapter One -"Our Hero is Born"
A night of passion, with an orange beast.
Pepe was in
for a feast.
Nine months later, a knock on the door,
A tiny patter of orange feet on the floor...
Half frog. Half sloth.
Slepe, its name.
Nothing
would ever be the same.
Chapter Two - "Empties the Nest"
Slepe’s childhood was full of love and laughter,
Daddy
Pepe thought they’d live happily ever after.
Until one fateful day, when Snoop Frog came over,
They
chilled, they smoked, they played poker.
With Snoop Frog around, Slepe got a passion for rhymes,
Slepe
spat over beats, Slepe collected the dimes.
A new life was calling, Slepe had to fly the nest,
Cya
loser Slepe yelled, Pepe was depressed.
Chapter Three - "Dev gets greedy, pt 1: A new token, so
soon?"
Slepe got lonely traveling far and wide,
Slepe felt quite
lost and needed a guide.
Suddenly Slepe stumbled upon some lost treasure,
Slepe
picked up the lamp and cleaned it for good measure.
A genie told Slepe to swap a coin for a wish,
Slepe
wished for a pink unicorn to befriend and squish.
A pink beast galloped out of the smoke,
Unipepe had
arrived and that horn was no joke.
Chapter Four - "Slepe Finney"
Slepe rides Unipepe, to the city by the sea,
Posts an ad
on Craig's List, showcasing skills for all to see.
Satoshi, struggling, spots Slepe's shining ad,
Thinks,
"This Dev's the one; Slepe’ll make Bitcoin
rad!"
With fingers swift, Slepe completes the code just right,
Bringing
Bitcoin to life, from darkness to light.
From a simple ad, Bitcoin rose to its height,
Thanks to
Slepe and Satoshi, partners in the night.
Chapter Five - "Dev gets greedy, pt 2: Another new token?
wtf?"
Slepe rose to fame releasing his own coin to behold,
Then
a knock on the door from someone weird and old.
Gensler kidnaps Slepe and throws away the key,
Attached
to strange equipment, with nowhere to pee.
Chapter Six - Prequel Teaser
A night of Searching for Slepe far and wide, Unipepe found not
a hair nor hide.
Until at last he picked up his
scent, at a house labeled "Gensler" and inside he
went.
At Last! Slepe had finally been found. Excited, Unipepe almost
shat on the ground!
With his magical horn, he set
his friend free. But it was very short lived, his moment of
glee...
Before he knew it, Unipepe's neck had been roped. Being
pulled into darkness, by an evil old dope.
He
kicked and screamed to no avail. All he could do was whimper
and wail.
Slepe woke up dazed and confused. He wasn't sure what hat
happened, but he felt he'd been used.
He saw a
strange helmet and handcuffs on the wall. And he thought he
could hear someone starting to bawl.
Slepe awakens, dazed and confused... Familiar cries fill the
stale putrid air. A friend is in trouble... being tortured...
abused...
As slepe gets closer... WTF?! A horrific sight! Unipepe’s
mothafucking horn!!!! Ah hell nahhhh! This can't be
right!!!
Beyond the basement door, a freak show has ensued. Is that...
a gimp... going doggy on Unipepe??? So erotic! I mean...
uhhm... rude! Yeah, super rude!!
-- A grand “VIOLENT” Scene! --
-- Boom! --
-- Hawk
Tuah! --
The “horny” scene ends with the gimp impaled, dead. Our hero
holds his best friend, Shaking, shivering, demented ideas
forming in his head
Gensler! Sick bastard was here the whole time. But the devil
incarnate, stands in his way... Slepe decides
no survivors at the end of this rhyme.
Burn, Baby Burn! GIMP, GENSLER, AND ALL. Slepe, the
BOSS-MOTHERFUCKER rides off, with the dev's chopper
under his balls.
The Dev is now dead, likely gensler and unipepe too... But
Slepe is free! All The thanks goes to you!
Our
hero is back on his epic quest...
What other adventures
will he have?
Stay tuned for the rest.
Basking in freedom (and occasional coke),
Slepe gets
secret DM from mysterious bloke
The Olympics are calling,
Slepe's talents to show
With a smirk on his face,
he's ready to go.
An Olympics maestro, a merciless winner
Slepe crushed
every contest, even pole with his wiener,
A champ at
break-dancing, knocking pretty gals flat,
Shooting
bullseyes in the socket, jumping pole like bat.
All gold collected, Slepe thought "Time for a
spree!"
Then same mystery mate says “Next stop -
Du-bai-eee”
With a cat dubbing tracks and blue dude on
dance floor,
Slepe partied so hard, he was soon on the
floor.
As the morning arrived, Slepe woke in haze
"Wtf had
just happened”, he cannot even guess:
A tattoo of Bitcoin
coked right on his chest,
Everything looks disgustingly
messed.
Slepe checks on his feed, "Oh snap, what's this
mess?"
Pics and rants posted, his life's now a
jest.
No fucks though to give, Slepe goes unmoved
Whatever
has happened, his dude kept him grooved.
Then off on a jet, his friend's private ride,
To
France, where they land.... With nowhere to hide.
Faaaawk....
Cops everywhere. Like bees to the hive,
His buddy is
nabbed, all freedoms deprived....
How will Slepe
continue his ride?
On a street corner dark, our boi Slepe did pause,
Scratching
his orange head at what he just saw.
Some sneaky mfers in
their fancy dark fits,
Moving all sus-like, giving Slepe
the shits.
"Holy fuck fam..." Slepe's brain started to
click,
These mfers be Cabal - the ones doing tha
trick!
Pumping n' dumping, controlling the game,
Making
retail ngmi while they stack all the gainz.
The
pieces aligned in Slepe's galaxy brain,
Time to save
crypto from degen pain!
BTFO'd dat Cabal virgin right in da face,
Yoinked
his drip while he sleepin' - str8 disgrace!
"Delivery
for Cabal ser!" but Slepe was there instead,
Got dem
Trezors while their homie dreamed of green dildos ahead.
Late night engineering, orange paws steady and lit,
Soldering
iron going brrrrr - modding this shit.
Trezor's guts
exposed under Slepe's careful touch,
These hardware
wallets finna hurt someone MUCH.
Cabal chads gathered round their fancy tech,
Plugged in
dem Trezors - now everything's REKT!
"Wtf
ser?!" as smoke starts to rise,
Hidden faces shocked
by Slepe's nasty surprise!
Up on the roof like a chad robinhood,
Orange fur glowing
- he did what he should!
While down below, phones
lighting up bright,
Airdrops for everyone! Cabal rekt
tonight!
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